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Keren Bartov has magic hands — it’s the only explanation for why I left her treatment room with the glowiest skin of my life. But don’t just take my word for it: she’s the celebrity esthetician behind some of the dewiest skin at the Met Gala on Monday, including Beyoncé, Kim Kardashian, and Hailey Bieber. No wonder she’s in such high demand — Bartov’s skincare knowledge is exceptional, and she knows exactly how to make skin look its best under the spotlight.
Bartov is so sought after that she has a four-storey, state-of-the-art facial clinic in London’s Notting Hill. Her clinic might be hi-tech (it promises more beep-boop machines than you could imagine), but Bartov believes it’s how you take care of your skin at home that really matters.
With that in mind, here are all the smart skincare rules I learned from Bartov and her team during a facial treatment.
Don’t sleep on your cleansing routine
Cleansing your skin effectively is the best thing you can do for it, according to Bartov. If you’re not lifting away your sunscreen, makeup, and all of the grime you’ve collected throughout the day, any skincare you apply in the evening won’t work to the best of its ability — and that’s a serious waste of both product and money.
Before you do anything, Bartov suggests washing your hands for at least 30 seconds. “Otherwise you’re putting bacteria all over your skin when you want to be washing it off — and that makes no sense at all,” she says. Bartov adds that this step is especially important for those with acne-prone skin, as oil and dirt can easily clog pores.
Simple is best, too. Bartov doesn’t enlist fancy cleansing devices, nor flannels or cloths. Your fingers are the best tools for the job. She recommends double cleansing at the end of the day (washing your face once and following up with a second cleanse, or using micellar water to remove makeup and then doing a proper, water-based cleanse) for at least a minute each time.
These ingredients are the best for breakouts
The benefits of exfoliating acids on acne-prone skin (for both preventing breakouts and minimizing the skin staining left behind) are well known, but it’s how you use them that matters. I often have blackheads, whiteheads, and little under-the-skin pimples, so Bartov layered salicylic acid (which exfoliates deep inside the pore to prevent breakouts) and azelaic acid (another exfoliating acid, which reduces redness and minimizes pigmentation over time).
Bartovs clinician said that patience is a virtue when layering serums and moisturizers. She suggested waiting at least three minutes between applying each skincare product so as not to disturb it on the skin and to give it time to fully absorb and work its magic. If it means you have to brush your teeth or tinker around the bathroom for a moment, that’s fine. It’s worth it to get the most out of your skincare. And always take any excess product right down to your neck and chest area, which Bartov said is often neglected.
Try these three ingredients for rejuvenated skin all year round
“Retinol, peptides, and vitamin C are important ingredients for stimulating collagen and elastin, and giving a glow to the skin,” said Bartov, who suggests using a retinol serum in the evening only.
Peptides (essentially skin-repairing proteins) are sneaking into all kinds of skincare products lately, particularly moisturizers, and they are tolerated well across the board. R29 rates Naturium Multi-Peptide Moisturizer, which hydrates, moisturizes, and protects skin. It also features vitamin C to shield against pollution.
If you’re using retinol at night, be sure to wear a broad-spectrum, high-factor sunscreen during the daytime, as retinol can make skin sensitive to sunlight.
Avoid this one thing if you’re prone to breakouts
As Bartov mentioned earlier, vitamin C is a brilliant ingredient for protecting skin against pollution and other environmental aggressors, as well as minimizing pigmentation and skin staining. But if you have active breakouts, Bartov suggests avoiding it altogether. L-ascorbic acid is currently a popular form of vitamin C as it’s really potent, but it could irritate in the form of stinging or burning, particularly on open skin. It can be especially irritating at higher concentrations.
While vitamin C is unlikely to make your breakouts worse (or cause them, for that matter), it can make your skin even more sensitive. If you really want to try it, skip the strong stuff and go for something like ascorbyl glucoside, which is derived from vitamin C. I love The Ordinary Ascorbyl Glucoside Solution 12%. Make sure it’s oil-free.
Take sun safety seriously
Bartov is the first to admit that she enjoys a handful of vices in life and doesn’t believe in cutting out certain foods or drinks. But basking in the sun is a no-go. Not only does it accelerate the aging process, but it’s linked to skin cancer.
“I personally enjoy my life,” said Bartov, “but I use products on my skin which stop these free radicals,” — including UV rays and cigarette smoke if you’re around smokers. Vitamin C is a good shield, and when she’s outside in summer, Bartov tops up her sunscreen every two hours. If you’re spending time outside in the winter (even just exercising for an hour or heading out on a walk), sunscreen is also a great shout, as UVA rays can penetrate clouds.
Facial treatments are an investment
Lastly, home skincare is not to be underestimated. But if you’re experiencing gripes like persistent breakouts or pigmentation, for example, you might like to give a pro treatment a go — budget depending. Bartov specializes in acne, pigmentation, and skin rejuvenation, and while she enlists lasers and lights to enhance the skin, she doesn’t offer injectables like Botox. Nor has she had Botox injections herself.
Considering the cost, you’d expect the results of a professional facial to be instant. But I learned that it can take two to three weeks to see the full effects of most treatments. In other words, patience is key.
One thing Bartov would always recommend leaving to the professionals is pore extraction, using either metal tools or your hands. Digging at pimples and blackheads could push bacteria sitting on your skin deep inside pores, potentially making the breakout worse and causing scarring or pigmentation. Bartov suggests layering a spot treatment on top of any breakout (big or small) to bring it down, and letting your face do the rest naturally. Try Murad Rapid Relief Acne Spot Treatment, which contains spot-busting salicylic acid, Zitsticka Killa patches, or CeraVe Blemish Control Gel, with salicylic acid and oil-reducing niacinamide.
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A few years ago, I experienced a period unlike any before it. Heavy, sharp aches pierced through my lower abdomen. The pain was so severe that I feared something was going terribly wrong inside of me. I was paranoid, convincing myself that my appendix had somehow bursted. As someone who has needed life-saving surgery in the past, I didn’t want to risk it. So I made the decision to go to the emergency room. A few hours later, I was diagnosed with ovarian cysts. Since then, I’ve never gone back for a follow-up, and I’ve never made another trip to that hospital, even when that agonizing pain returns. I can’t afford to. That visit to an emergency room in New Jersey to rule out that I was dying cost me $2,800. Meanwhile, that surgery that saved my life in Colombia cost just $12, the price for a tube my doctor had to order from another hospital.
Since then, I’ve chosen to do all my medical tests and appointments in Colombia, where my father was born. This year alone, I’ve gone there for dental care, routine checkups, and gynecological visits. Part of the reason I can even make this choice is because I have family there, a place to stay, and people I trust who can help me navigate the country’s healthcare system. But a bigger part is, simply, because even with the cost of flying to South America, medical care there is just more affordable for me.
“I’ve chosen to do all my medical tests and appointments in Colombia, where my father was born.”
natasha lópez
About 17% of immigrants in the U.S. receive medical care abroad, often returning to their home country for routine check-ups and necessary procedures. And Latines, specifically, are the most likely to take a trip back home for care. It makes sense. Latines are the most uninsured racial or ethnic group in the U.S., with a 2024 CDC report finding that Latine adults are roughly 2-to-3 times more likely to be uninsured than non-Latine white adults.
But I’ve learned recently that it’s not just us. A few weeks ago, while I was on vacation in the Dominican Republic, driving to my hotel, I saw a billboard that made me purse my lips and raise my eyebrows: “World-class medical care for U.S. veterans.” While I knew countless Latine friends and relatives who traveled to their homelands, or their parents’ origin countries, for medical attention, it didn’t occur to me that other Americans, including those without ties to Latin America or the Caribbean, and even those who were willing to sacrifice their lives for the U.S., would have to leave their home for medical care, too.
“I think about how many of us are forced to become casual about symptoms because panic is too expensive. I’ve seen what happens when people wait too long, not because they want to, but because our healthcare system makes waiting feel like the only option.”
NATASHA lópez
I mean, I know medical tourism is nothing new. I, for one, will never skip a video of a girl traveling to Medellín to get all her aesthetic procedures done, or a bald guy going to Turkey and showing his months-later hair transplant results, or someone documenting one of those international hospital wings designed specifically for foreigners who come to get a whole medical workup abroad. But this wasn’t cosmetic; it was basic healthcare.
According to the CDC, millions of U.S. residents travel internationally for medical care each year, with many going to Mexico, the Caribbean, Central America, and South America. Mexico alone attracts roughly 1.2 million American medical travelers annually, with one study showing that 9% of the people who cross the border into Mexico do so specifically for healthcare. These are Americans without health insurance as well as those who are insured but still can’t afford astronomical copays, deductibles, and out-of-pocket medical costs. In the U.S., even routine care can cost hundreds of dollars, with emergency room visits running into the thousands before insurance fully kicks in. And these traveling patients often save 40% to 80% on tests and procedures.
“Healthcare should be a universal right, but in the U.S. too many of us learn to measure pain against cost before we ever measure it against risk.”
natasha lópez
Health is wealth, sure, but so often that phrase sounds like a threat. Americans shouldn’t have to leave our country just to be seen by a doctor. Preventive care shouldn’t feel like something we do only when we can afford to be responsible. When I feel sick, or when the possibility of being truly seen by a doctor feels far away, I think about what waiting does to people. I think about how many of us are forced to become casual about symptoms because panic is too expensive. I’ve seen what happens when people wait too long, not because they want to, but because our healthcare system makes waiting feel like the only option. Healthcare should be a universal right, but in the U.S. too many of us learn to measure pain against cost before we ever measure it against risk.
The only regret I have about getting my medical care in Colombia this year is that I didn’t stay longer to have every lingering concern in my body checked. Traveling to Latin America has been more affordable for me, and the care I received there was also better. I am, of course, not the only Latina doing this. Below, five Latinas share their experiences traveling to Latin America and the Caribbean for healthcare, what pushed them out of the U.S. system, and what it means to feel cared for somewhere else.
Gracie, 27, Southern California 🇲🇽
I’m originally from Southern California’s Imperial Valley, which is right on the Mexico-California border. Growing up, crossing into Mexico for medical care was very normal. I would go for physical exams, if I was sick, if I needed medication, dental cleanings, or even glasses. I would go four or five times a year just for medical care, and I know people who went more frequently.
Now that I’m living in New York, access to healthcare feels very different. In Mexico, sometimes you don’t even need a referral. You can just go in, tell them what the problem is, and they will help you. Here, you need referrals, insurance approval, appointments, and so many calls. I’m a student, and I don’t know how to do all these processes. It’s tedious. It’s taxing. I’m not used to it. There’s also the difference in cost. In Mexico, you pay $20, $30, $40, or maybe $100, if it’s specialized. Here, my partner just paid $350 for a physical. Flexibility is an issue, too. There, some places are open late or even 24 hours on weekends. Here, it takes weeks to get an appointment, and they’re only open during certain hours. If I’m at work, I have to call out, and I need that money. If I have class, I have to decide between class, work, or getting treatment.
I haven’t gone back to Mexico for care since moving because, on a good weekend, it’s maybe $400 to $600 to fly, and I’m on a limited income. Being away from the border has changed my security around healthcare. I can’t just walk or drive across and know I’m going to be seen by someone. I’ve always known healthcare in the U.S. was an issue, but now that I’m disconnected from the border, I feel it. Accessibility is so important to any social system, any human right. Healthcare in the U.S. isn’t treated like that.
Mariana Carolina, 27, New York 🇻🇪
I’ve always gone back home for my annual checkups, things like endocrinology, gynecology, dermatology, and internal medicine. It’s become part of how I take care of myself, not just physically but mentally, too. Venezuela has a reputation for producing incredibly skilled doctors, people who are not only well-trained but deeply committed to their patients, and I’ve felt that firsthand. There’s a level of care and attention that feels very human. In the U.S., my experience has been the opposite. Appointments feel rushed, even transactional. Back home, I feel like my doctors are actually invested in my health.
In Venezuela, I pay everything out of pocket, but one consultation with my gynecologist is around $100, and that includes an ultrasound, pap smear, and STD testing, pretty much all the basics. In the U.S., even with insurance, something as basic as an ultrasound might not be covered unless you already have symptoms. And that’s always been confusing to me. How are you supposed to catch something early if you’re only tested once something is wrong?
But beyond the cost, it’s the feeling of actually being thoroughly examined and taken seriously that makes the biggest difference. Back home, I feel seen from start to finish. There’s no rushing, no cutting corners. They ask questions. They take their time. It feels like real care. For instance, last year, when I went to my gynecologist in Venezuela, she told me my ovaries were very swollen and that I likely had PCOS-related problems, which could affect my fertility if left untreated. That was the first time anyone had ever told me that, and I had been going to a gynecologist in the U.S. for years. So I was frustrated but also relieved. Like finally someone took the time to really look. Thankfully, I don’t have any severe illnesses, but that’s also what scares me because I genuinely don’t know if something would’ve been caught early if I had stayed within this system. At some point, choosing to leave for care stopped feeling like an option and started feeling like the only way to really take care of myself.
I’ve made peace with the fact that I’ll continue flying home once a year for my checkups. Even if it means paying for flights and planning around it, the peace of mind is worth it. Honestly, it feels like something I have to do. I’ve been in the U.S. for nine years, and I really tried to trust the system. But over time, I realized that unless you’re in pain or something is already wrong, it’s hard to be taken seriously. I don’t think it’s about individual doctors. I think a lot of them want to help. But the system, especially insurance, limits what they can actually do, and that’s where it breaks.
Maria, 36, New York 🇩🇴
When I was living in New York, I would travel back to the Dominican Republic for any specialist, dentist, and imaging that I needed, whether it was X-rays or MRIs. What made me decide to seek treatment there was the cost. One time, I had to get an MRI of my knee in New York. Yes, I had insurance in the U.S., but my deductible was $1,600. They told me I hadn’t met it, so I would have to pay $1,600 for the MRI. A few months later, during a trip to DR, I decided to do it there. I got a doctor who ordered the MRI and we communicated via WhatsApp. Once there, I got an MRI of both knees, and it cost me $200.
Still, the main difference between care in the U.S. and the Dominican Republic is the way you are treated. In the U.S., you can be seen by two or three people before you see the specialist you came to see, and then that specialist sees you for a total of three minutes. Whereas in the Dominican Republic, you go to a doctor and you can spend a whole hour with them. They listen to you. They pay attention to what you’re telling them. And they try to reassure you that you’re going to get the care that you deserve. That, to me, is priceless.
I understand there is nuance, though. I was working in the U.S., earning money in U.S. dollars, and I was able to exchange those dollars for Dominican pesos. I know there is privilege in that. For Americans, $100 to see a specialist might feel like nothing, but for Dominicans working day to day to make ends meet, it is a lot of money. So I also have to look at it from that perspective. But that’s also what’s happening for people in the U.S., hardworking people who are trying to make ends meet are being forced to pay exorbitant amounts of money for basic medical care. The U.S. system is broken.
Amanda Wright Perez, 27, Brooklyn, NY 🇨🇺🇯🇲
I have traveled to Bogotá, Colombia, for dental care, specifically gum contouring, a dental filling, and teeth whitening. The main reason I chose to do it in Latin America instead of the U.S. was cost and quality. In the U.S., gum contouring would’ve cost me anywhere from $3,000 to $6,000. In Colombia, I paid $250, and the results were amazing. While there, I also had a filling done. I had done it in the U.S., but it wasn’t done properly. Even after going back a second time, I was still in pain, and I felt like the issue wasn’t really being resolved. Since I was already in Colombia, I had it redone there for $120, and I haven’t had any pain or sensitivity since. Overall, I spent about $820 total for everything. In the U.S., that could’ve easily been several thousand dollars. I planned everything about four months in advance, so I knew what I needed to save, and even including my flight and hotel, it was still more affordable than doing it all in the U.S.
The quality of care in Bogotá was incredible. The dentists were extremely attentive, kind, and detail-oriented. They explained things clearly, took their time, and even gave me a full goodie bag with dental products after. In the U.S., my experience has often felt more rushed, like once they’re done, you’re out the door. In Colombia, I genuinely felt cared for, and that made a big difference. It’s honestly changed my perspective a lot. I’ve even started planning to go to Colombia once or twice a year for care because the experience is better, more affordable, and feels more personal.
Sofia Bukele, 38, Miami 🇸🇻
Since I moved to the U.S. in 2018, I’ve been going back to my doctors in El Salvador. I go back to visit my gynecologist, dentist, and every regular checkup that I need to do. I go back because they know me, they know my history, they know everything. It’s easier, it’s faster, and I don’t have to wait several months just to get an appointment. Obviously, it’s cheaper, too. I usually pay around $40 to $60 per appointment there. Here, it’s basically whatever the out-of-pocket cost is depending on the insurance that I have, and even with insurance, it can still feel expensive and confusing.
I’ve never really liked the experience of healthcare here in the U.S. There have been times when I’ve gone with my sister to appointments, and she gets a QR code, and then a nurse comes in three or four times just to scan it before we even see the doctor. Then we still have to wait until the doctor comes. It feels very impersonal. Like you’re being processed through a system instead of being cared for by someone who knows you or is actually taking the time to listen. That’s why I try not to do any appointments here unless I really have to.
Honestly, it sucks. It’s really sad because the U.S. is such a great country with so much potential, and yet the health system feels like such a failure.
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"I get asked to do things like this quite often, and I, on the whole, say no because it’s not normally the right partner with the right set of belief systems or standards. But 20 years ago, I was interested in doing this," McCartney explained in a press junket. "I stipulated a very clear list of requirements all around sustainability. They managed, to their credit, to deliver on [those] sustainability [goals], and it sold out in seconds."
Today's collection, which features modern takes on archival styles and "icons," like the brand's studded "Rock Royalty" tee and Falabella chains, keeps sustainable materials at the forefront, featuring organic cotton, recycled crystals, and RWS Standard-certified wool.
"I really wanted to make it quite gender-fluid. Because I wear men’s suits all the time, so anyone can wear it," McCartney said, adding: "I want a younger, wider audience to have access to myself [and] to impact people’s wardrobe in a positive way."
From sharp tailoring, oversized shirting, chic shoulder bags, and trench coats (for more workwear-inspired pieces) to bejeweled prints, sparkling tops, mixed-metal jewelry, and mesh dresses (perfect for parties), the cross-seasonal collection is equally nostalgic and modern, especially when modeled by today's It girls like Reneé Rapp, Adwoa Aboah, and Angelina Kendall.
Ahead, preview and plan your purchase from the much-anticipated H&M x Stella McCartney collaboration. Then come back prepared on May 7th at 10am EST to shop your favorite limited-edition pieces before they inevitably sell out.
All linked products are independently selected by our editors. If you purchase any of these products, we may earn a commission.
I have a confession to make, and depending on who you ask, it’s either a cardinal sin or a badge of honor: I wear perfume to the gym. Not a polite little spritz, either. A full, committed dousing before I even think about a treadmill. Monday StairMaster? Byredo Blanche. Wednesday weights? Jo Malone London English Pear & Freesia. Friday leg day? Diptyque Fleur de Peau. Every workout has its own fragrance alter ego — and I’m not sorry about it.
For me, part of it is aesthetic. Fragrance is performative, whether you’re deep in beauty culture or just like smelling good. It’s a tool for confidence, and in the gym, that matters. TikTok is especially into it, with entire corners now devoted to “gym scents”, which seem to be as curated as gym ‘fits. Think luxury activewear and color-coordinated water bottles — but in fragrance form. The algorithm is flooded with soft musks, clean laundry notes, and “your skin but better” scents — fragrances designed to suggest you naturally smell this good after working up a sweat
But that’s where the controversy begins because “smelling incredible” is entirely subjective. For every person carefully selecting a workout fragrance, another is wondering why they’re being forced to inhale a cloying vanilla body mist between sets. What reads as a subtle skin scent to one person can feel like chemical warfare in a poorly ventilated spin studio to another. So with gym fragrance now dividing both the internet and the free weights section, the question is unavoidable: Is it a confidence-boosting tactic, or have we collectively lost sight of basic gym etiquette?
Does perfume belong in the gym?
In many cases, a so-called gym fragrance is less about the perfume itself and more about the routine behind it. Like a playlist that locks you into workout mode, scent can act as a psychological trigger — a small cue that pulls you into focus before you’ve even touched a dumbbell.
Stacy-Jayne Archer, senior marketing manager and fragrance enthusiast at Miller Harris, agrees: “It might seem extra to wear fragrance to the gym, but it can be a psychological anchor. Performance isn’t purely physical; it’s also about mindset.” Archer adds that while wearing a scent you like might not directly improve performance, it can create a placebo effect. Sure enough, research shows that some scents can improve performance through expectation alone.
But the best definition of a gym scent I’ve heard didn’t come from an expert at all. Mid-strength session, I complimented a woman in my gym on her perfume, and she shrugged: “It’s my ritual — a spray before I work out.” That stuck with me because maybe gym fragrance isn’t really about perfume at all; it’s about intention.
Some things are universally accepted as bad gym etiquette: filming strangers mid-workout, occupying a machine for 45 minutes while “resting”, and — depending on who you ask — turning up to Pilates smelling like Sephora’s perfume aisle. Gym fragrance might sound harmless, but if TikTok comments are anything to go by, it’s surprisingly divisive. What one person considers subtle, another experiences as an unsolicited assault on the senses. And once sweat enters the equation, things get even murkier. But more on that later.
For certified fragrance specialist Eudora Nwasike, the debate comes down to one thing: projection. “Wearing something overpowering in a shared, enclosed space is where it becomes inconsiderate,” she says. “The gym is not the place for a heavy sillage,” she adds — essentially the scent trail a fragrance leaves behind.
While fragrance enthusiasts might argue that a clean skin scent is no more offensive than someone’s aggressively fruity pre-workout powder, gym goers like Elise Augustin aren’t entirely convinced. “If it’s super strong, I find it jarring,” she says. “Sweat spreads all scents, not just body odor, and in a space designed almost entirely around heavy breathing, overpowering perfume can quickly become impossible to ignore.”
What sweat does to your gym scent & why it matters
Before I go any further, a quick chemistry lesson. Heat naturally amplifies scent (hence why you might spray perfume onto your pulse points), but exercise takes things to an entirely different level. “Heat accelerates everything,” explains Michelle Feeney, founder of Floral Street. “The fragrance opens up and develops faster,” she adds. “It can also shift the balance of notes, sometimes making deeper ingredients [think rose, oud, and patchouli] more pronounced while lighter ones [like citrus] disappear more quickly.” With this in mind, it’s easy to see how a mix of different fragrances can easily become overwhelming. Consider this your reminder that the gym is not the ideal environment for a perfume with delusions of grandeur.
Alice Bradley sits firmly on the other side of the debate: “I think fragrance is so much better worn and enjoyed in a workout space,” she tells me. For Bradley, gym perfume is less about vanity and more about transformation. “It’s an identity shift,” she says. “If you have a good fragrance, it helps you step into the person you want to be and embody that person.” For Bradley, perfume is part of the ritual — another layer of confidence before stepping onto the gym floor.
Perhaps the unwritten rule of gym fragrance isn’t “don’t wear perfume.” It’s knowing what is appropriate. A skin-close musk? Fine. A cloud of oud which reaches the squat rack before you do? Maybe save that for dinner. Nwasike describes the ideal gym scent as something “tranquil, centering, and airy” — a fragrance that uplifts without demanding attention. Which, arguably, feels like the entire point. A gym scent shouldn’t arrive before you do; it should sit close enough to feel part of the workout itself.
How to choose a gym fragrance — & the best subtle scents to try
By now, the rules of gym fragrance feel fairly clear: keep it delicate and close to the skin. But if the idea of giving up fragrance entirely feels unrealistic (same), the good news is there are ways to wear scent considerately, and lighter formats tend to work best. “Body mists sit much closer to the skin,” explains Archer, as opposed to eau de parfums or extraits, which feature a higher percentage of perfume oil. Archer adds, “The softer structure of body mists means they diffuse gently rather than projecting aggressively, making them feel more like a veil than a statement.”
Nwasike, who wears perfume to the gym herself, rates fresh citruses, skin-like musks, and cool florals, such as peony, neroli, and orange blossom — scents that work with body heat rather than against it. She pinpoints Chloé Atelier de Fleurs Vert Soleil and Armani Privē Santal Dān Shā as breathable, subtle, and considerate examples.
Personally, I consider myself something of a gym fragrance connoisseur. My current rotation includes Diptyque Orphéon Hair Mist and Glossier Sandstone body mist — the perfect middle ground between “I’d like to smell nice” and “I don’t want to overwhelm.” On days when I want something soft, but very much there,I’ll reach for Jo Malone’s English Pear and Freesia layered with one of Rare Beauty’s fragrance balms (Floral Peony Blossom is very gym-appropriate). Then there are the days when, admittedly, I do want my presence to be known. Those are reserved for Juliette Has A Gun Superdose and Byredo Blanche, because if nobody tells me I smell great before I leave, was the workout even worth it?
At the end of the day, the gym is a shared space, and everyone’s paying to be there, whether they arrive drenched in Baccarat Rouge 540 or armed with nothing but deodorant and determination. The unwritten rules of the gym have always boiled down to one thing: consideration. Ultimately, perfume can belong in the gym, just not in the way TikTok might suggest. If a subtle spritz helps you feel stronger, sharper, or even remotely enthusiastic about Bulgarian split squats before sunrise, who am I to stand in the way of that?
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Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.
This week: a mental health counselor working in private practice who makes $58,765 per year and spends some of it on two posters that I’ve been eyeing for my dining room wall for months.
This Money Diary was written in the fall of 2025.
Editor’s note: After a short hiatus, we’re back once a week! Thank you for your patience. We’ll be honoring Money Diary submissions we received during our break by publishing them in the coming weeks. There’s more to come soon — stay tuned.
If you’d like to submit your own Money Diary, you can do so via our online form. We pay $150 for each published diary. Apologies but we’re not able to reply to every email.Please note: We are legally unable to publish any diaries that have been written with the use of AI.
Trigger warning: This diary mentions sudden death.
Occupation: Mental health counselor Industry: Behavioral health Age: 46 Location: Queens, NY Salary: $58,765 Joint Income/Financial Setup: Assets: My one-bedroom co-op apartment purchased in 2024 for $265,000 (I put almost 50% down, thanks to my parents, so that I wouldn’t have an insane mortgage payment every month. My immigrant father joked that it was the money he saved for the wedding I will never have, so he might as well help me get a home). Checking Account: $11,485.93 Savings Account: $15,508.92 Schwab Brokerage Account: $320,935.13 (stocks gifted to me by my mother right before I started shopping for a home to improve my chances of getting approved for a mortgage and by a co-op board). Debt: Mortgage: $138,084.19 VISA Sapphire credit card: $2,345 Paycheck Amount (1x weekly): $1493.88 Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing Costs: Mortgage: $945.29 HOA: $1034.25 (covers electric/gas, water, heat, property taxes, maintenance). This was recently raised for the second time this year due to increased utilities and operating costs; however, the board and most elderly residents are resistant to making any changes that would bring down said costs, like installing solar panels on all of our roofs or upgrading boilers to deliver more efficient heat. This is one of the drawbacks of cooperative living, but it was the only way I was going to become a homeowner. The jump to homeownership came from a pretty traumatic experience in the rent-stabilized apartment I lived in for almost 10 years. I could never rent again after that, but I also didn’t have $700K laying around to buy a home in a semi-decent neighborhood, which is what the more affordable options go for these days in the boroughs. Loan Payments: None. I paid off my two student loans in 2023 and 2024, respectively. Internet: $49.99 Phone: $16 (family plan) Planet Fitness/gym: $20.89 Fidelis Health Insurance: $431.39 Subscriptions: $9.99 (Discovery Plus); $11.99 (Hulu); $19.59 (Netflix); $0.99 (Apple Storage); $29 (Psychology Today); $86 (Simple Practice management software); $136.10 (insurance management services). Personal Therapy: $500 (my provider doesn’t take my insurance so it’s all out of pocket). Annual expenses charged in different months of the year as follows: Chase Sapphire Rewards: $99 (Jan); Planet Fitness Black membership: $40.76 (June); ACA (professional counseling association): $189 (Oct); HSPO Professional Liability Insurance: $108 (Nov); Home/COOP owner’s Insurance w/ Plymouth Assurance: $383 (Dec).
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it There was a lot of pressure to obtain higher education as an eldest daughter and child of immigrants. My father had a fifth-grade education, but my mother was able to attain a Master’s degree. This created a lot of tension and mixed messages about what it means to be highly educated and female in my culture. I was simultaneously encouraged to soak up all the knowledge, but also told to “dumb it down” so as not to intimidate men. I chose to attend one of the city colleges so that I could afford to pay for it on my own without loans. Once I completed my undergraduate studies, I spent most of my twenties in a spiral of “dumbing it down” while also trying to figure out what I wanted to do outside of my family’s expectations of me. At age 30, I decided to complete a two-year associate’s program in a health-related field that informed my path to becoming a mental health professional. I took out loans to pay for this, but my mother supported my living expenses at that time, in secret, so as to avoid my father’s disapproval. This was the case in her family during a time when most women were getting married right out of high school, but my grandmother told her never to be dependent on a man. I think this “you can only rely on yourself” mentality has helped me achieve a lot in my current career, including paying for grad school without any loans and establishing a private practice to work for myself once I became licensed.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s) educate you about finances? My parents have a solid immigrant work ethic, but a huge scarcity mentality stemming from the war and poverty they grew up with that was passed down to their kids. It was ingrained in me never to owe anyone ANYTHING, so all debts get paid in full, and you don’t borrow money unless there is no other way. My father was able to establish a comfortable middle-class lifestyle (when that still existed) for us growing up, but you would never know it by the way he would qualify everything with, “We don’t have money for that.” I tend to be tighter with the purse strings than a lot of my friends, and I used to wonder how they complained about being broke when they made three times my salary. It felt like an achievement to exist on so little, but I have come to realize how “non-negotiable” setting aside funds for quality-of-life expenses like nice dinners, art shows, and travel is for my mental well-being.
What was your first job and why did you get it? I worked 15 hours a week in my senior year of high school at a local retail chain. One of my childhood friends was already working there and got me an interview with the general manager, this older Italian lady who treated us like her grandkids. I used the money I saved to pay for my first semester of college.
Did you worry about money growing up? I did and I didn’t. I felt safe and secure in my parents’ ability to provide for all the necessities of life, but shut down and shamed for wanting anything beyond that. There was always this anxious dread of having to ask for money to pay for things my father wouldn’t approve of, which was almost everything. I couldn’t wait to start working, but my father initially disapproved of this, too, because he couldn’t control what I did with my own money.
Do you worry about money now? I do, but more so about securing my future. I always have enough to eat and pay my bills, but I worry about the rising costs of everything and my ability to save for any kind of retirement tract with the way the world is right now. I’m riding the wave for now, but there are just too many unknowns.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net? While I began paying all of my own expenses at 17-years-old, I became financially emancipated when I moved out of my parents’ home at age 24. I had to move back for a few months at age 34 and again at age 44 while I secured new housing, but I paid for all of my needs myself to avoid any kind of dependency that could lead to guilting. I know that I can rely on them in an emergency, but their financial help is often conditional and comes with a cost.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. My parents gifted me the down payment funds for my current apartment purchase. My mother also transferred stock funds over to me so that I could boost my assets on paper for my home purchase. I treat these like an inheritance since it all came from the sale of my late grandfather’s home back in 2017.
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Day One: Monday
6:30 a.m. — I wake up at 6:30 a.m. to the “alarm” of my neighbors leaving for work (alas, the dry wall doesn’t provide any kind of sound buffer in this building). I take my supplements and brew a K-Cup of dark roast coffee that I mix with a scoop of L-theanine (an amino acid that helps manage my anxiety and improves sleep). I’ve been taking it for five months and feel a difference in my ability to calm down from a stressful work day. I add a teaspoon of turbinado sugar and some organic half-and-half to create my own version of whipped coffee. I answer my 13-year-old niece’s text about her mother’s birthday gift to ask if she wants help paying for it. Her response: “Well, I have like five dollars, soooooo.” I laugh and tell her to buy the card. I order the gift on Amazon ($38.75) and start going through my emails to prepare for the workday. I have a slew of administrative tasks related to insurance and a continuing education course that needs to get done before my evening appointments. $38.75
10:30 a.m. — I squeeze in a workout around 10 a.m. and make myself an egg and cheese croissant for breakfast afterward. I usually work out fasted and don’t have my first meal of the day until 10:30-11 a.m. I take a brain break around 2 p.m. to watch the news and have a snack of sliced apple and a clementine. The government shutdown and all the instability in the world is making everyone super anxious and depressed, myself included. While coping skills and action plans are great “triage,” we need more definitive guarantees that the basics of food, shelter, and healthcare won’t be taken away. I’m right there with a lot of my clients in that feeling of just treading water. I finish my continuing education course around 4 p.m. and lie on the floor to ground my nervous system before I head into my back-to-back client sessions.
7:30 p.m. — I submit insurance claims and sign off for the day at 7:30 p.m. I decide to indulge in the rest of my hazelnut truffles from ION, my favorite Greek chocolate brand, leftover from Halloween, and watch a few episodes of The Golden Girls to wind down from the day. I grew up watching this as a little girl, and it brings me a familiar comfort not unlike my own grandmother wrapping me up in a blanket while feeding me ridiculous stories and cheesecake. I start to feel sleepy around 9:30 p.m. and decide it’s time for bed. This day is done.
Daily Total: $38.75
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Day Two: Tuesday
5:53 a.m. — I awoke at 5:53 a.m. due to the upstairs neighbors having a case of the “dropsies.” I take my supplements, make my whipped coffee drink, and scroll through election-related news to properly wake up my brain. I’m anxious about what the situation will be like at the polling station today. Last year, security had to remove people because the scanners were malfunctioning, and they became aggressive and accusatory toward the volunteers. I try to distract my mind by making a list of all the self-care I want to engage in this week, including getting my hair done and having dinner with my good friend/mentor who happens to be in town. I finish my coffee, shower, and get dressed to walk over to my polling station, about two miles from where I live. The walk will be good for clearing my head and moving some of this anxious energy out.
11:00 a.m. — There are barely any people there when I arrive and voting takes less than five minutes. I buy a brownie and a small water from the PTA bake sale ($4) in the front lobby and walk back the longer way to get an extra mile of cardio in. I decide to pop into my hair salon, hoping to be squeezed in, but my stylist is fully booked and gives me an appointment for Friday. I make another pit stop at my liquor store to replenish my wine cabinet with some Primitivo, but settle for a Rioja and Italian Cabernet blend. ($30.98) I make a large cruciferous salad with grilled olives and the Tvarog farmer’s cheese I bought last week from the Euro market. I toast a pita and dip it into some olive oil as I watch the news for updates on the election. $34.98
8:30 p.m. — I finish a little later than expected due to going over the time with my last client and sign off from all my admin around 8:30 p.m. I decide to indulge in some of the free Halloween candy I swiped while making my hair appointment, while I begin a back-and-forth of texts and voice notes with a guy I matched with. I actually feel excited about how much we have in common and the ease of our conversation so far. Dating in my city can be very mentally taxing, and I had just paused my profile when his match came through. I feel cautiously optimistic…for now. My eyelids start closing around 10:45 p.m. — it’s way past my bedtime.
Daily Total: $34.98
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Day Three: Wednesday
7:15 a.m. — I wake up at 7:15 am (gasp) feeling rested, but a little dehydrated from the dry heat of my radiators. I look at my phone and see the election results, along with texts from my sister about my niece’s Christmas-related meltdown after seeing a gift she has to have. I take my supplements, make my whipped coffee drink, and check emails before starting on progress notes from the last two days. Wednesdays are one of my longer days with appointments spread out from 11 until 8 p.m., so I want to get ahead of the paperwork as much as possible. I schedule my next three days of home workouts to make sure I prioritize time for my own well-being. Work-life balance is why I went into private practice, but sometimes I fall off on making use of my breaks for myself instead of trying to catch up on all the administrative work. I’m trying to be better about this, especially with the holiday “trigger” season coming up.
10:30 a.m. — I shower and make my first meal of the day — two slices of Ukrainian dark bread with hummus, brie cheese, grilled olives, and a boiled egg — before I log into my first appointment.
3:00 p.m. — My mom drops by for a surprise visit during my long break, midafternoon, with cookies from a local bakery to have over coffee. I forgo doing notes to relax and listen to the gossip of extended family drama. I decide to walk her half the way back home, which gets in two miles of much-needed movement before I sit for the last of my appointments.
7:50 p.m. — I log off for the day at 7:50 p.m. and snack on apple slices as I wait for my phone date with the guy I had been texting the previous day. Unfortunately, the ease of conversation that I had been feeling thus far isn’t there in real time. I’m put off by how scripted he’s coming off and the questions he’s asking that make it clear he didn’t really listen to any of the voice notes with particular attention. I feel like I’m talking to an AI chat bot. As he rambles on about a project he’s working on, he discloses some key information that lets me know we don’t align in our dating intentions. I tell him that I’m starting to fade and need to let him go at the one-hour 17-minute mark of our call, but he continues his monologue, saying that he just had to get that out before he let me go. I finally hang up at 10:30 p.m. and watch half an episode of The Golden Girls to reset before sleep overtakes me.
Daily Total: $0
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Day Four: Thursday
5:53 a.m. — I wake up at 5:53 a.m. from insane anxiety dreams that I immediately write down. I take my supplements, make my whipped coffee, and set up for my morning workout — kickboxing and deep core activation. I finish around 9:30 a.m. and make a second cup of coffee as I work on progress notes from the previous day. I take the DND off my phone and am inundated with texts and notifications about the tragic death of a classmate. I make a note of the memorial and respond to the group chat fundraising for their family.
10:30 a.m. — I lose my appetite, but force myself to eat a post-workout meal at 10:30 a.m. of Ukrainian dark bread, jamón, brie, and the rest of the hummus. I slice an apple with peanut butter to get some additional fat and protein in. I’m grateful to have my own therapy this morning. There are very few safe spaces these days and I really need to feel seen, heard, and understood. Therapy supports me to be able to do this work at a high level while also allowing me to be a human with my own “messy” emotions.
12:30 p.m. — After therapy, I place an order on Sephora for my daily moisturizer from Biossance ($44.42), taking advantage of its 15% off storewide sale. I finish my apple slices and continue working on progress notes until my first appointment of the day. I decide to use my long break for a nap, but end up watching the news a little longer than I probably should have, and reposting therapy-related content to my IG stories. I do some household chores to reset my head before heading into my client calls. $44.42
4:30 p.m. — I make an early dinner of orzo with capers, grated Locatelli and cracked pepper, along with the rest of the jamón, that I eat before the last two calls of the day. I check my phone and see a text from my match about his project (his own words: “I can’t shut up about this thing”). I respond to it out of politeness, but I know I have to tell him that I’m not feeling this. It’s a conversation I have no bandwidth for tonight, so I put the Do Not Disturb back on.
7:30 p.m. — I finish my final admin tasks before logging off. I foam roll and stretch to release the tension of sitting for the past two hours. I decide to unwind by watching the latest episode of The Great British Bake Off. I get weepy about how kind and sweet everyone is toward one another. There’s not enough of that in the world right now. I decide to listen to my body and crash early at 9:30 p.m.
Daily Total: $44.42
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Day Five: Friday
4:00 a.m. — I wake up drenched in sweat at 4 a.m. due to my apartment being unbelievably hot. I realize that I forgot to leave the window open a crack as I usually do. I drink 16 ounces of water and lie back down with the early morning breeze hitting me, hoping sleep will return, but it doesn’t. I get up, take my supplements, and make my whipped coffee as I settle into my morning guilty pleasure of looking at real estate on Zillow. I text my sister about yet another tragic event — a neighborhood kid who was killed on his way to school yesterday morning — to see if my niece knew him. Her school is offering students crisis support, but I want to make myself available in case she needs to talk. I learn that two of her classmates have been critically injured in e-bike accidents this year, but she doesn’t know this kid. My heart hurts for how devastated his parents are and what will happen to the driver who hit him.
9:00 a.m. — I make a second cup of coffee around 7:30 a.m. and get started on the rest of the progress notes from the week. Fridays are when I catch up on all unfinished business. I’m psyched for my hair appointment and dinner date later on tonight. I get my workout done around 9 a.m. and make a breakfast of two fried eggs on a whole wheat pita with roasted grapes that I made last week, and the rest of the brie. My fridge is now painfully empty so a grocery run is in order, but not going to happen today. My brain feels like soup from the 4 a.m. wake-up and I can’t organize my thoughts to get anything done other than napping. I finish one more note before lying on my couch for a few hours.
1:30 p.m. — I wake up with enough time to make my hair appointment at 1:45 p.m. It’s a local spot owned by a raspy Fran Drescher-type stylist who chain smokes throughout the service, but she does the job well enough. I pay for my single process color and blowout with tip in cash ($160) and rush home to change for my dinner date at a trendy Mexican spot in the city. I love seeing my mentor/friend because our conversations always recharge my battery and remind me that I’m more than just my job. $160.00
6:30 p.m. — Dinner consists of various tostadas, octopus and duck carnitas, and a spicy serrano margarita. The bartender treats us to a shot of the smoothest tequila blanco I’ve ever tasted from a brand called Lalo to enjoy with our cornhusk meringue dessert. My friend insists that dinner is her treat, so I feel doubly taken care of after such a hard week.
9:00 p.m. — I head home on the subway and bus ($5.90) with a full belly and heart, but I’m fading hard. I get home at 10:45 p.m., wash my face, and crawl into bed immediately…with the window open this time. $5.90
Daily Total: $165.90
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Day Six: Saturday
7:00 a.m. — I wake up at 7:00 a.m. from pleasant dreams for once, but feeling the beginning of a cold coming on. I take my supplements, make my whipped coffee, and browse Crate and Barrel’s holiday gift suggestions. I’m hosting my family for Thanksgiving this year and need to source a good serving dish and bar accessory kit in preparation for that. I text my sister and brother-in-law for their ETA in coming to help me install some lights and window fixtures in the house. I push back my dinner plans with friends to make sure that I have enough time to commute without stressing. There is no subway service in my area this weekend, which is typical for the city. We joke that the MTA laughs when you make plans. I plan out which trains I will be taking to visit a friend out of state tomorrow and continue working on progress notes now that my brain is back online.
11:00 a.m. — I hop in the shower and get dressed around 11 a.m. before making myself a sandwich from Trader Joe’s veggie burger patty, a boiled egg, Twaróg farmer’s cheese, and cracked pepper on two slices of Ukrainian dark bread. I have the last of my sour pickles for some crunch and probiotics as I watch the latest news on the government shutdown.
2:00 p.m. — I decide to order my Christmas tree from Kohl’s ($32.65) and housewarming ornament from Etsy ($24.90), taking advantage of its pre-Black Friday deals before my sister and family arrive around 3 p.m. We spend the next two hours discovering all the structural issues of this early 1950s construction that make our tasks at hand more challenging than they need to be. Thankfully, my brother-in-law is a master “jury rigger” and saves the day. His love language is fixing things and acts of service. $57.55
5:30 p.m. — I clean up like a madwoman and text the group chat to let my friends know that I’m running late. I’m ravenous by this point and regret that I didn’t have a snack to hold me over. I miss the bus ($2.90) by seconds and end up getting to the soup dumpling shop 20 minutes late. The wait time for a table is 40 minutes. I text for an ETA and learn that one of them is having a family emergency. My other friend shows up just as our table number is called. Both of us are stressed for very different reasons, but at least we have food. $2.90
7:15 p.m. — We dine on pork dumplings, chive and scallion pancakes, and cucumber garlic salad. This place turns over tables the second you’re done eating, so after I pay the check ($38.41), we decide to grab some dessert from a local Chinese bakery (her treat) and walk off the rest of this frazzled energy on the way to her car. Parking is nonexistent in this area of Queens so it’s a good ten-minute walk to get there. I’m home by 9 p.m. and eat my well-earned dessert of crème brûlée after washing my face and changing into PJs. I end up falling asleep on the couch and get into my bed around 10 p.m. $38.41
Daily Total: $98.86
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Day Seven: Sunday
6:45 a.m. — I awoke at 6:45 a.m. to the high-pitched sound of some kind of engine outside my window. There is no sleep for the weary in this hood, I swear! I take my supplements, make my whipped coffee, and do some online shopping for two posters ($27.95) that I’ve been eyeing for my dining room wall for months. I’m shifting toward more decorative “nesting” now that all the major home improvements are done. $27.95
9:30 a.m. — I shower, get dressed, and pack my overnight bag for my visit with my friend out of state. I check the train schedule again to make sure everything is running on time and buy my e-ticket before heading out for my walk to the station. $16.25
10:45 a.m. — I make a pit stop at a local cafe to grab a latte and two mini croissants that I pay for in cash before boarding the train. I text my friend my ETA as I settle into my three-hour commute and start reading When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté. She responds by suggesting I order a Lyft to her place once I arrive because she’s still working. $13.56
2:30 p.m. — My driver ends up being Turkish and we vibe to the music of a famous pop singer that’s pretty well known in my culture, too, on the ride to my friend’s place. I read another chapter of my book and make a coffee as I wait for my friend to free up from her meeting. After a two-minute-long hug (we haven’t seen each other in over three months), we decide to stay in for the night because we’re both fried from our respective weeks and it’s already semi-dark out at 4 p.m. $35.77
5:00 p.m. — We take a quick ride over to the local liquor store, where the owner is known for offering samples of new tequilas. I find their only bottle of Lalo, that amazing tequila I had on Friday, and buy it for our evening in. My friend makes a glorious curry noodle bowl for us with mushrooms, squash, onion, chili crisp, and coconut milk as we sip our tequila and have the most epic catch-up. $53.16
10:00 p.m. — We gorge on some snacks after dinner from Trader Joe’s for dessert, including dark chocolate butter cookies, chocolate-covered mini pretzels, and chocolate-covered potato chip “Snacky Clusters.” I call it a night around 11:00 p.m. — good eats and tequila did its job, and I let sleep overtake me.
Daily Total: $146.69
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Conclusion
Conclusion: “I’ve realised that I don’t eat enough throughout the day and need to be better about grocery shopping in bulk or at least on a more frequent basis so I don’t end up at absolute zero. I feel that I did really well with self-care expenses during probably one of the most financially stressful years of my life. I didn’t default to deprivation and austerity in response to that anxiety. Overall, it’s helped me confirm that I can still have a work-life balance even when income ebbs.”
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Like a flame in the darkness, Pluto retrograde in Aquarius inspires the spark within, helping us to strategize ways to enrich both society and the self. Although we are making moves at this time, we aren’t screaming about them from the rooftops. Instead, we’re quietly assessing how to transform. The next several months are allowing us to plot and plan for the future.
Pluto turns retrograde for approximately five months every year. During this time, Pluto gets a chance to reevaluate the changes that it’s making as well as dealing with power struggles and the way clandestine matters are revealed. This time around, Pluto will be moonwalking in the air sign Aquarius. From May 6th to October 15th, we will be in the state of deep analysis, contemplating our past moves and deciding how to put our best foot forward. The journey backward will open our eyes, giving us the insight we need to implement growth.
Past issues with friends and loved ones may resurface, leading to arguments. Don’t be fooled by the context of what is said: the basis for the drama is jealousy and control. Someone is tired of receiving negative thoughts and words and they will start to pushback. To be real, they don’t deserve the negging. The reason this occurs more during the retrograde is because when Pluto slows down, it gives people time to think about matters and shake them up. After all, what good is being moody if we can’t take our feelings out on anyone else?
The flip side to this energy is that Pluto retrograde in Aquarius could mend fences. Rather than tearing relationships apart, this transit could bring friends, lovers, or family members back together. However, we have to do the work to make things right. We can’t just blink our eyes and be okay. Apologizing and learning from mistakes made is vital — more importantly, being accountable. Pluto retrograde can create better dynamics once it understands matters from a soulful perspective, resulting from sharing intimate stories with those we care about. Friendships that are limiting or holding us back will be put on ice as we decide how to incorporate them into our current state of being.
On an individual level, this period marks a time of introspection and reflection. We might augment ourselves by dyeing our hair pink or mixing our fits. The same applies to ideas and aspirations. The bottom line is that experimenting will make us feel powerful and radiant. Fitting in with the status quo isn’t something to adhere to — it is what we’re fighting against. Assimilation is something that should stay behind in the past.
Other areas highlighted during the retrograde are health matters, intuition, and societal change. Oftentimes, people suffer from unexpected physical conditions that surface during the retrograde. The silver lining is that Pluto retrograde wants us to heal, so it’s shedding light on repressed or unforeseen matters that require attention. The chances of getting to a state of well-being are high since Pluto retrograde helps us regain stamina.
People might try to gaslight us, but we don’t have to give them any mind or attention when we know what is true. Also, it can be challenging for global progress, as everyone wants to revert to old ways of being. We must ensure that no one is slipping into old beliefs or patterns and choosing to think radically.
All in all, Pluto retrograde in Aquarius won’t be a super challenging time. Of course, this astrological transit will allow us to see areas that need to evolve in our lives for the better. Do not fear the retrograde! It’s going to bring necessary change. Welcome it with open arms.
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The first Monday in May is here, and the Hollywood and fashion elite are gearing up for one of the biggest nights in entertainment: the Met Gala. But, like every year, the backlash to the world’s rich and famous flaunting their wealth while the world is on fire has been swift and passionate. Protestors have been making their dissent known throughout New York City since February, when Amazon founder and noted evil billionaire, Jeff Bezos, and his wife, Lauren Sanchez Bezos, were announced as the event’s honorary co-chairs and lead sponsors of the fundraiser for the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute.
But the calls to boycott the annual, invitation-only gala are nothing new. There’s a long history of organizers and activists pushing against the event, which sees tables going for upwards of $100,000. When people can barely afford to buy eggs or basic healthcare, and gas prices are astronomical, it’s understandable why this egregious display of excess is off-putting. Critics of Bezos’ involvement with the gala cite a long list of concerns, as per The New York Times, which includes major layoffs and editorial decisions at The Washington Post, which he owns; Amazon’s donations to President Donald Trump’s inauguration fund; and Amazon’s backing of a $40 million documentary about the first lady Melania Trump.
Bezos reportedly contributed $10 million dollars to the Met Gala, which does ultimately serve to fund the Costume Institute, but aside from a general surge in anti-billionaire sentiment (imagine supporting billionaires in this economy?!), people are upset because of Amazon’s treatment of its workers and its ties to Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). Amazon workers have said they’ve had to skip bathroom breaks and urinate in bottles. To shed light on these horrific workplace conditions, a guerrilla activist group called Everyone Hates Elon(yes, as in Musk) has been leading boycott calls by plastering posters on New York subway cars and bus stops and projecting slogans on buildings. On Friday, the group placed 300 bottles of fake urine inside the Museum.
Say what you will about the fake pee stunt, but it was an effective way to get everyone talking. This is part of why protesting is so important. The Met Gala is one of the biggest platforms in the world, with millions of eyeballs focused on what Beyoncé (also a co-chair of the event) and other celebrities will be wearing. What so many of these causes — like workers’ rights, the war in Iran, genocides in Gaza and Sudan, the affordability crisis — need is more attention. New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani knows this. Despite some of his predecessors attending the Met Gala, Mamdani is opting to skip the event, citing that he’s focused on “making the most expensive city in the United States affordable.”
And this morning, while stylists have been steaming, makeup artists have been primping, and hairspray has been spraying, Mamdani made a point to highlight the people behind the scenes — six local industry garment workers are featured in a new portrait series by Kara McCurdy, including former Amazon delivery employees. (This morning, a group of organizations, including the Service Employees International Union, the Strategic Organizing Center, and the Amazon Labor Union staged a Ball Without Billionaires in which workers for Amazon, Uber, and Starbucks served as models).
A red carpet with this much global attention could be used to challenge power… If the night is going to center excess and spectacle, it might as well also reflect the realities people are protesting outside those museum steps.
kathleen newman-bremang
“The fashion industry is made possible by the thousands of workers behind the scenes — seamstresses, tailors, retail workers, delivery drivers — whose immense talent and dedication deserves to be celebrated,” Mamdani told i-D. This is a great point, and it’s also why I can’t do away with the Met Gala completely. There may be better ways to highlight the workers behind the scenes, but this event is one of the ways, and at its core, the Met Gala is a fundraising event for a museum that needs money to survive (although, it may be financially independent soon). Plus, this night employs hundreds of artists, stylists, fashion workers, and working-class people in New York.
As for the celebrities, Zendaya is also reportedly skipping the Met Gala and Meryl Streep, who has actually never been, is also likely not attending. It is not confirmed if any celebs skipping the night are doing so in solidarity with the protestors, but if they are, it would be nice to actually hear that stance from them. I know there was backlash when Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez showed up to the Met wearing a “Tax the Rich” dress, but I do think this is a perfect platform for celebrities to use fashion as messaging. The Met Gala is literally about the intersection of art and culture, so why not lean into that? Clothes have always been political, whether people want them to be or not, and a red carpet with this much global attention could be used to challenge power, spark conversation, and make a statement that goes beyond aesthetics. If the night is going to center excess and spectacle, it might as well also reflect the realities people are protesting outside those museum steps.
In the words of Miranda Priestly in The Devil Wears Prada 2, the Bezoses are not visionaries, they are vendors — and the fact that they are two of the faces of an event that is supposed to be a celebration of art makes very little sense. On the surface, The Devil Wears Prada 2 is an entertaining sequel, full of glossy fashion moments and sharp one-liners, but underneath all that, it’s poking at something deeper: who actually gets to shape fashion and culture, and at what cost? When money becomes the loudest voice in the room, creativity risks becoming just another commodity (see: Emily).
The satire hits a little too close to home when you look at what’s happening around the Met Gala right now. Billionaires underwriting culture isn’t new, but the growing discomfort with that reality is. The movie frames it as absurd — editors bending to sponsors, art bending to capital — but outside the theater, it’s playing out in real time. What’s being protested isn’t just one event, but a broader system where wealth doesn’t just fund art, it influences it. And increasingly, people are asking whether that influence is something we should keep accepting as the price of admission. I don’t think we should.
“The Met Gala is now giving Bezos exactly the kind of reputation laundering and cultural rocket fuel he needs to keep destroying America,” Cynthia Nixon, Gilded Age actress and activist who ran for New York governor in 2018, said to The New York Times. She’s not wrong, and it’s through these protests (and notable people refusing to show up), that public pressure starts to chip away at the gloss. It shifts the narrative from spectacle to scrutiny, forcing a closer look at who benefits from these cultural moments. And if that attention keeps building, it could push institutions to rethink who they align with — and why.
What’s being protested isn’t just one event, but a broader system where wealth doesn’t just fund art, it influences it. And increasingly, people are asking whether that influence is something we should keep accepting as the price of admission. I don’t think we should.
kathleen newman-bremang
Potentially one day, The Costume Institute won’t need Vogue or billionaires to continue their important work. Until then, I think it’s important to be having these conversations. The activists doing the work of protesting and organizing to send a message to Bezos and the world about class inequality and ICE terrorizing U.S. neighborhoods is necessary. The spectacle that is the Met Gala will go on, but pressure being applied outside its iconic steps is what will force a broader reckoning about who gets to fund culture, who it serves, and whose voices are too often not given seats at $100,000 tables.
Ultimately, it’s up to us, the consumers, if we want to engage in any of it. I completely understand the decision to opt out. For us here at Refinery29, we have jobs to do. We cover Amazon in our shopping stories, because many working-class people depend on its low prices, but that’s what makes their practices even more egregious. We follow culture. We cover fashion, entertainment, and pop culture, and this — for better and for worse — is a massive cultural event. Personally, I’ll be looking out for celebs who use their Met Gala look to prove that art is political and who aren’t afraid to say it with their full chests, in a room with the man responsible for so much oppression and, increasingly, attacks on press freedom. I want to see them demonstrate that fashion can speak louder than hollow donations and that art can never be bought.
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